Okay, so Since creating the first piece of written material, i am happy, yet….
i have confused myself here with my angle. I have way too many ideas that i need to hone in! The influences have helped, yet i think the more i listen to… the more topics arise for me that i arise with and i’m loosing sight of what i actually want to address. And that is,
the fear of the future.
FOCUS JODIE! I guess this is the point i am trying to make… about my overactive and creative mind… however i need to find my through line now. So i know i want an office scene… and i want to slip into a daydream… and i want other voices to influence me… so i think i have a direction now. I have found a song of which i think could accompany my daydreams in some way…
2. I MONSTER – Daydream In Blue (2013)
My idea for my piece consists of me sat at a desk, dazing out of the window. Music kicks in, i deliver a spoken word song / poem about my daydreams. What shakes me and wakes me up from these dreams is a projection of the words flashing ‘STOP FUCKING DREAMING’ accompanied by an alarm clock noise… and the day begins again, and i continue to daydream until authoritative voices come in and out, from other desks, i want the voice of my boss, and voices throughout my life that have said i need to settle down to come in and eventually kill my dreams. The daydreams eventually stop. To end, i will have listened to the voices, and the ability to daydream stops. I become robotised, a pillar to society. I wear grey suits and deliver perhaps a work conference speech, where the colour from my mind, clothes and voice become grey and monotonous, but i am congratulated for my efforts within the business world. I sit back at my desk, turn on the radio… and the song plays in the radio, which reminds me to still dream and the message to the audience should be clear.
What this means is, i need words that relate entirely to this concept, and to steer away from social media. What i can do, introduce voices that talk of the things in life that i see as unimportant. I have explored different texts now. I wrote another poem below:
When she was 2 she played in the dirt
As the sprinklers in the grass would spurt
She made sure that no small thing could get hurt
The things that you love are going to kill you
She said
And as that replayed in her head
She thought of the time she could have been dead
As she sit in the garden with jelly on her tongue
A wasp was lured in by the sun
And The
strawberry scent and how it hung
and then
Into the mouth, it stung and stung
I remember the ice lolly to sooth the pain
It was my sisters and she cried in vain
But I always remember the real shame
A wasp had died, and I was to blame
‘due to whats happened it is imperative that she does not get stung again and if she does she will need immediate emergency attention, as it is likely she will go into anaphylactic shock’
we flower pressed him under the word wasp in the dictionary
I never knew they had legs quite so hairy
I imagined he has a wife called mary and suddenly he didn’t seem so scary
The very next day I went back out
Into the garden I had no doubts
I picked up a wasp I just wanted a friend
It turned around and stung me again
I knew I was a forgiving child
With a heart that was made for the wild
Protector of insects that nobody loves
Maggot and worms I found in the shrubs
If you stood on a snail I would mourn for days
So sometimes when you catch me in a gaze
I’m not just having one of those days
I’m thinking about every different way
That I seem to be stuck in this phase, of life
It feels like I feel too much
Think too much, dream big and sink too much
On the brink, too much
And that’s why I think so much
About the simplest of things
Because when she was 14
life lessons began
Family, hearts and emotions ran
She would write down lyrics and paint and draw and act
There was something within the future of that
‘you’ve got to go into acting, girl you’ve got a talent’
‘you know you are gonna be famous, you are’
‘you know, one day youre gonna be a star’
If you just keep the dream in the near not far
When there’s so many things
For the lesson learned was one I still hold
To learn from things you have to be bold
I want to give my love to things
That respond to love with a harsh sting
I still love wasps just as much
But now I am much more weary to touch
But love regardless and that I do
Believe in people and believe in you
You can do whatever you want to do
The shape of your life is up to you
‘but what if I want to get away from it all,
Worry about the trees and the fall
And not about the kids at school or the teachers and tutors
2012
If you let too much get on top of you, you’re never going to make it
Listen ma I think I can take it
I got dreams and I know for my sake its
Not gonna matter if I get in a relationship
Its never going to ruin my plans
to give
a bit of my love to another man
Instead of
Putting my all into my passions
Chasing my dream will never go out of fashion
2. I MONSTER – Daydream In Blue (2013) Youtube Video added by Dharma Records. Available at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhB6Lb7_kN8